Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Top 10 Excuses By Matt Estrella For Taping the Jets' Sideline

The New England Patriots are currently in hot water with the NFL, after the league determined that the Patriots illegally videotaped defensive signals by the New York Jets’ coaches on Sunday. NFL security officials had confiscated a camera and videotape from New England video assistant Matt Estrella during the first quarter of the Patriots’ 38-14 victory.

New England faces the possibility of significant sanctions from commissioner Roger Goodell, including the potential loss of multiple draft picks. The Patriots will be allowed to present their case before Goodell makes his decision. As part of the team’s defense, Estrella has reportedly prepared his top 10 excuses for taping the Jets’ sideline. Here is an exclusive look at his list.

10. I figured Joe Namath would be making creepy passes at a sideline reporter again.

9. Seriously, does Tom Brady really need my help against the Jets?

8. I had politely asked the Jets’ coaches to tell us their defensive strategy, and the bastards said no!

7. No one stopped me, since the home fans were too busy cheering Chad Pennington’s injury.

6. Since I was in Jersey, I was trying to shoot a better ending to The Sopranos.

5. I heard that Miss Teen South Carolina was on the Jets’ sideline.

4. Come on, aren’t you glad someone actually shot some video WITHOUT Peyton Manning?

3. My judgment was impaired after that injection from Rodney Harrison.

2. I needed evidence to expose the Jets’ dog-fighting ring.


1. It was either that, or making a Bill Belichick sex tape.