Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Brave Old World

In news that’s as surprising as finding a drunk person in Buckhead, the Braves have clinched another division title.  That makes it 14 in a row since 1991.  Here’s a by-the-numbers look at Atlanta’s run, from 1 to 14.


1     World Series titles during the run

2     Episodes of “World’s Scariest Police Chases” shown on TBS during a Braves rain delay

3     Winning seasons for Atlanta in the 14 years prior to 1991

4     Profanities yelled by a typical Mets fan between pitches to Chipper Jones

5     Consecutive years in which the Braves have been eliminated from the post-season at Turner Field

6     Cy Young Awards won by Atlanta pitchers during the streak

7     John Rocker’s beloved train in New York

8     Runs given up by Danny Kolb in a typical outing

9     Games won for the 1987 AL East champion Tigers by Doyle Alexander after a deadline trade from Atlanta.  In return, the Braves got some minor league stiff named Smoltz.

10    Regular season at-bats for Francisco Cabrera in 1992 before NLCS heroics

11    Franchises who have eliminated the Braves from the playoffs since 1991

12    Foam tomahawk chops swallowed by a deceased fan in an ill-fated attempt to impress his buddies

13    Rocking motions made by Leo Mazzone between pitches

14    Average age of the 2005 starting lineup


Amid the exciting development, Braves fans everywhere are exclaiming, “Yeah, whatever…”