Vick Abbreviations: Old & New

The week's dominant sports story is that Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick will enter a guilty plea next Monday in a federal dogfighting case. At that time, Vick will make official his stunning fall from celebrated athlete to convicted felon. To see just how much his fortunes have plummeted, here's a look at numerous Vick-related abbreviations. First are the old, traditional meanings, followed by their new context.


NFL:
Old: National Football League
New: Now Freedom's Lost

NFC:
Old: National Football Conference
New: No Fighting Canines

ATL:
Old: Atlanta
New: Against The Law

VPI:
Old: Virginia Polytechnic Institute
New: Vick's Pending Incarceration

PETA:
Old: People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals
New: Plea Entered, Tells Attorney

ASPCA:
Old: American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty of Animals
New: Atlanta Sundays: Petrino's Crushing Agony

ESPN:
Old: Entertainment & Sports Programming Network
New: Endorsements? "Sayonara," Proclaims Nike

W-L:
Old: Won-Loss
New: Walled Lifestyle

QB:
Old: Quarterback
New: Queasy Blank

ATT:
Old: Attempts
New: Acquaintances: Totally Trouble

COMP:
Old: Completions
New: Cellmate's Opinion: Michael's Pretty

PCT:
Old: Percentage
New: Puppies Count, Too

TD:
Old: Touchdown
New: Torture-free Dogs

INT:
Old: Interception
New: Inmate, Not Teammate

YPA:
Old: Yards Per Attempt
New: Your Pet's Avenged