Sunday, October 16, 2005

Coca-Cola Giddy Over Rodriguez, Guerrero Pepsi Ad

The White Sox have advanced to their first World Series since 1959. Monday, the Astros can earn their first-ever birth in the Fall Classic. However, despite the first round exit of the Braves, the biggest postseason winner calls Atlanta home. Coca-Cola executives are delighted with the heavy rotation of Pepsi’s commercial with Alex Rodriguez and Vladimir Guerrero.


Rodriguez faced the brunt of Yankee fans’ criticism after the club’s division series loss to the Angels. The likely American League MVP had just two hits in 15 at-bats and failed to drive in a run during the series. His futility was best exemplified by his ninth inning double play in the decisive fifth game.


Likewise, Guerrero endured much adversity during the playoffs. Although his Angels triumphed in the first round, he failed to drive in a run versus the Yankees. His ALCS performance was downright miserable, with one hit in 20 at-bats. With no contribution from the 2004 American League MVP, the Angels fell to Chicago in five games.


The struggles of these two superstars, noted a Coca-Cola spokesman, prove that “Pepsi is a drink for chokers. When viewers watch these guys perform miserably, then see them drinking Pepsi, what other conclusion can they reach?”  The spokesman suggested some additional ideas he thought would be perfect for his rival cola. One involved a Coca-Cola can rolling through Bill Buckner’s legs before he manages to snag a Pepsi. Another possibility featured Chris Webber calling a time-out to drink a Pepsi.


In contrast, the spokesman invoked a famous Coca-Cola commercial involving an athlete.  “What did Mean Joe Greene ever win? Only four Super Bowls! And he shows he’s a sweet guy when he gives the kid his jersey.”  On the other hand, the spokesman continued, “Guerrero shatters the moon in his ad, depriving the earth of its largest satellite. What a selfish jerk!”


Coca-Cola has declined to purchase advertising time during the World Series. Reaping the rewards of Pepsi’s efforts will do just nicely.